Last week I saw what looked like a tall Elvis walking around Harvard with dynamite strapped to his crotch area. I think he was trying to blast off his nuts. Do you think that tall Elvis considering becoming a female just so he can experience penis envy?

Penis Envy in Harvard, I believe you witnessed another sighting of the man known as Smelvis. The last time I talked to him he did seem to show some interest in gender re-assignment surgery, but the use of dynamite never came up. If you see Smelvis armed with explosives again please call the authorities immediately, I can't think of anything worse than a nutless female Smelvis running around...again.